a rainbow baby

You who have been reading Juicy Fruit for a while know that I've called Moxie "Rainbow" from the get-go. So many reasons... but to me, it just seemed to fit. The songs that helped me through the miscarriage of Ziggy were all about rainbows, looking up. And then in the early days of Moxie-growing, it seemed like she was getting a big kick out of everything. Laughing. Like she was just really bright, full of colour. Energy.

Even in those incredibly bleak times. I was so very confused because I was hearing one thing from the doctors and feeling another thing entirely from her. It's like the like feeling I had from the very, very beginning - that it would be a difficult pregnancy but that everything would end up very well. I had no idea at all what that means - still don't - but there it is.

This morning on on my Mommy Group thread, there was talk about 'Rainbow Babies' - and then others asking what a Rainbow Baby is. I got chills... big time. A Rainbow Baby is is a child born after a loss - a miscarriage, a stillbirth. Like it's said:

It is understood that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of any storm. When a rainbow appears, it does not mean that the storm never happened or that we are not still dealing with its aftermath. It means that something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover, but the rainbow provides a counterbalance of color, energy and hope.

Wow.

I can't believe it. And here I thought I was just giving her a nickname!